Something Shiny! - Conversations category

Take two of these and call me in the morning

Mon, 09 Jun 2008 13:17:16 GMT

Me [talking about two friends]: So this year they will have been married eight years!
John: Wow!
Me: Guess that means they made it past the seven year itch.
John: What?
Me: You haven't heard about that?
John: I thought it was a disease.
::silence::
John: No? Not a disease?

A flux capacitor?

Fri, 06 Jun 2008 12:52:58 GMT

I am truly a child of the '80s. Whenever John talks to me about capacitors of any kind, I interrupt with a Back to the Future reference. It usually goes something like this:

John: So if I could hook it up to a capacitor...
Me: A flux capacitor?
John: Uh, no

John: In order to do that, I'd need to start with a capacitor and...
Me: A flux capacitor?
John: sigh

John: He wanted to sell us a capacitor.
Me: A flux capacitor?
John: AAARGH!

Apparently a flux capacitor doesn't actually exist. Whatever, dude.

All the world's a classroom

Fri, 16 May 2008 13:28:39 GMT

Me: Is Amy Winehouse not the ugliest woman in the world?

John: I don't know who she is.

Me: Well, she's a singer... [shows him a picture]

John: OH MY GOD! [recoils in shock]

Food to make alligators big and strong

Fri, 02 May 2008 13:43:29 GMT

I woke up the other night with a start. John was still awake.

Me: "I had a dream... well... I think it was a dream."

John: "Okay..."

Me: "I dreamt that I left out a bunch of food. Food that makes alligators big and strong."

John: "... ..."

Me: "And a bunch of alligators came and ate it."

John: "And did they get big and strong?"

Me: "...yeah."

Wait, were you joking?

Wed, 12 Mar 2008 18:15:02 GMT

John: We should take the Game Cube with us to New York!

Me: That's a GREAT idea!

John: ... .....

Me: Wait, were you joking?

John: Uh, yeah.

Pants and their bandwagons

Thu, 28 Feb 2008 12:43:20 GMT

John [shopping online]: Maybe I should just get on the bandwagon and buy some convertible pants.

Me: There's a bandwagon for convertible pants?

John: Oh, sure.

Me: ... ...

John: No? [beat] Is it the band or the wagon you're opposed to?