The kid thing

I'm still not sure about the kid thing. I really like the life that John and I have now, I like our freedom. Once you have kids, you know, you can't give them back. It's not like renting a movie, finding out you don't like it, and being able to take it back to the store. If you find out you don't like parenthood, you're pretty much stuck with that movie for life. Or eighteen years. (And don't get me started on the fact that I'm not exactly wild about children to begin with.) But beyond that, beyond not being sure about the kid thing, is the timing thing. I've pretty much nixed having kids in graduate school. Babies and graduate school do not mix, in my mind, especially when the graduate student (me) would be the person-- you know-- being pregnant, having the kid, recovering... I could go on and on. Changing diapers and writing a dissertation don't mix. So, if not in graduate school, when? When I get my first job, pre-tenure? It's a pretty well-documented fact that universities frown on faculty members (yes, women more so than men) being on the parenting track. So do I wait until after I get tenure, when I'm (gulp) in my late thirties? I don't think so! I don't want to be nearing retirement when my kids are begging for beer money. So the timing thing is, clearly, problematic. And I know, I know, I know: "there is never a good time to have children." I get that. I've heard it a million times. But certainly there's a better time than this, eh?